so what ; i`m a rock star .
i don’t really want to be a rock star, or a pop star, or any kind of crazy singing star with a bandwagon of groupies and sex scandals filed and kept away from the media. if i became famous, i’d like it to have something to do with literature or arts. i’d like to write books that are deemed classics, even though no one will understand a word in twenty years time. not that that’s very likely.
so i don’t know why sometimes, when i’m walking home late at night and it’s all quiet, i just feel an urge to start singing.
to be honest, i’m not a very good singer. if i were randomly singing on the street and you happened to walk past, you’d probably think “…what the fuck.”
but late at night, in the cold darkness of winter with one street light dispersed over a ten metre radius, and the trees covering at least half of that, it just makes so much sense.
at first i start humming, and my mind tags along with the words of the song in tow. eventually it gets to a point where i imagine myself singing and dancing on the street, but restrain myself as there are still lights coming from people’s houses. it’s a rather awkward moment really, between me and myself.
once in a while i’ll even look around to see if there’s anyone walking past, watching and sensing my intent. and if not, in the darkness i remain high spirited and free. and i continue dancing and singing in my head.
maybe i play my music too loud.