twilight .

soundtrack: kell; dedicated // thoughts: of the rant to come

msn spaces revamped, and the current photo uploader makes you do things one by one. needless to say, i can’t be fucked. i’m thinking of creating a gallery for all my photos. maybe when i get bored of my holidays, which hasn’t happened yet. no need to worry though, there’s still two and a half months to go.

the rest of this post will be dedicated entirely to bitching about twilight. fangirls beware. actually, i think it might be good for the fangirls. they may come to a realisation, an epiphany, an understanding, a conclusion. the conclusion that twilight is a piece of smoking shit (things smell worse when they’re burning).

so i watched the movie. why, you may ask, since i continually professed my dislike for the book? in all honesty, i watched the movie because the trailer seemed good. funnily enough, the trailer showed the only good parts of the movie; the special effects. the only exciting part in the whole a hundred and something minutes was the fight scene between edward and james. it lasted about thirty seconds. the rest of the film was about as low as the deepest part of the bermuda triangle.

the film started off very slow. the acting was awkward, and made something unrealistic seem even more so. the extreme close ups of bella and edward looking at each other got really old after a while, emphasising the fact that the people that were filming didn’t really know what they were doing. the lines, especially the ones taken from the book, were cheesy and cliche. there was no character development in anyone apart from edward and bella, and even that was stilted and awkward and seemingly too fast. one moment they were strangers, and the next moment bella says something about “i know it’s an act to keep people away, but i can see what’s on the inside.” seriously, if only love in real life were that simple. we’d be so overpopulated the continets would sink. we’d also be unable to lie or cheat, because everyone could see through us.

and to top it all off, the people were ugly. i mean, for goodness sakes, EVERYONE (apart from alice, and bella from some angles where her bushy hair doesn’t get in the way) was ugly. maybe i have high standards? or maybe the casting director has bad taste. there were asians. and the asians were ugly. and i’m allowed to say that, because i’m asian, so don’t report me for racism or anything.

i cringed. i really did. i wanted my $13 back, but then realised that i deserved getting my money taken away from me for choosing to watch such a shit movie.

all in all, i’d give it one star out of ten. the one star is for alice being attractive, and the thirty seconds of suspense and tension, which was consequently ruined by bella’s awful act of writhing in pain on the floor.

    • TW
    • December 18th, 2008

    Ahahaha, I’m sorry you put yourself through that. I know the lead actor that played Edward purposely bombed his role; being pretty vocal that the character has no redeeming qualities what-so-ever. I could write a novel about how much I hate Twilight, but I’m afraid of a few lady friends finding out and creating a mob to kill me. Frankly, I want to live.

    You better make it up and treat yourself to Watchmen when it hits theaters. ’cause I say so.

  1. I could write a lot too. But yes, female friends, crazy teenage girls and romantics at heart that love Edward would tie me to a stake and burn me.

    And I will go watch the Watchmen trailer right now 🙂

    • TW
    • December 21st, 2008

    Edward is the poster boy for ‘abusive boyfriends’! It’s horrible. Anyways!

    What do you think of Watchmen, huh? I’m excited for it since it’s my favorite graphic novel. It’s so well-written. I’m hoping the movie will be just as thought-provoking.

  2. The trailer looked interesting, but all the comic-obsessed people I know always get disappointed by their favourite comic movies. Hopefully it won’t be the same for you.

    I don’t know when it’s coming out here, but I shall watch it when it does 🙂

  1. January 4th, 2009
    Trackback from : liger

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