pawns .

as a form of procrastination, i was reading through some old documents that i had written during my youthful years. well, two and a half years ago.

i discovered that i once used quite a lot of profanity in my writing, more so than now, and also that my streams of consciousness led to many strange places. although i swear a lot less these days, pretty much nothing has changed.

at the moment i’m in the cycle of resolution making and breaking once again. the first resolution i’ve made is to purchase the sims 3 after my last exam tomorrow for a $99.95 that i really shouldn’t be spending. apparently i can get it for $19.95 if i trade in 2 ps3/xbox360/Wii games, which unfortunately i do not have.

scandalous .

like most shallow people that will admit they love gossip girl, and the seemingly deeper ones that try to conceal it, i’m addicted. to think that one could be a part of the world such as the upper east side of manhattan is striking and absolutely drool-worthy, just like all the characters in the show.

they play with our emotions, causing us to love one character at a time before their innermost devil is exposed, moving the limelight onto another rich, spoilt and misunderstood bitch. they spill scandal after scandal until a bunch of crazy connections are intertwined in our heads about who’s sleeping with whom and whose parents have illegitimate children together. we love it.

% .

a sigh of relief just escaped my body. i don’t have anything to do until semester exams. which is in a month.

party time? hardly.

i start work at vodafone a week from today. it should be interesting, and hopefully it will earn me a lot of commission, but i’m also a little apprehensive. in the mail two days ago i received a 3kg package full of all the documents i had to read and sign. when i pulled it out i almost fell over. that’s how crazy it is. throughout the papers there were tabs that exclaimed “SIGN HERE!” which made me feel like i was signing divorce papers like they do in the movies.

quicksand .

i think explosm is down. either that or i can’t access it through my proxy server as well as the normal one. i’m devastated. i love explosm. i wish i had been given warning that it would happen. hold that thought though.

i’ve been watching a lot of one tree hill lately since i’ve been sick, and right now it’s all about people dying and moving on. they all want warning. in real life, we’d probably want warning too, if our loved ones were about to die. fair warning, that’s all.

i’m trying to think of all the things i’d do differently if i knew someone was going to die tomorrow. obviously it varies with who the person is, but there has to be something. because if you’d want to do it for the reason that they’re not going to be there anymore, it still means you want to do it, and there has to be a reason for that. i’m sure everyone has it.

going, going, gone .

soundtrack: nothing really // thoughts: of a journey

i’m going away! i’ll be back in 7 days, on the 9th of december, with lots of photos and stories. the excitement just wore off, probably because i’ve finished packing. i can’t believe it’s december already. furthermore, i can’t believe it is the december, the end, of my high school life.

i still haven’t been bored so far, which is a good sign. i have a feeling that things are going to slow down soon, though, especially after coffs. but i’m going to enjoy this while i can. the good stuff is all gone though; formal, post-hsc parties, post-hsc relief.

so what now?

eighteen .

 soundtrack: mario; i miss my friend // thoughts: are rather lethargic

i basically did nothing today. i upgraded a few parts of my blog (minor changes that took much effort) and i helped some people on the wordpress support forums. i think i’ll fail tomorrow. but at least i’m nice and relaxed about it. next week, however, i have a feeling i’ll be freaking out. fuck.

you know, i really think that the anticipation and waiting for the hsc has been a lot worse than the actual exams will be. i’ll clarify that tomorrow though, so don’t quote me on that yet. stressing is tiring and bad for the body and soul. i have a healthy spirit.

when the war is over .

starting november 3rd, i will (in order);

# buy maddie helium balloons as compensation for missing her birthday

# buy an r4 and download millions of DS games (and play them)

# lots of shopping

# get my P plates (after doing a few hours of instructed driving first)